A part of me is dying, and it hurts. Letting go of layers of beliefs that are drowning me. But the greatest feeling lurking behind is relief. Behind all the anger, the rage of unfelt understanding, of words blowing away in the wind for no one to listen to, or worst, to be ignored… Worst for my mind, my ego, the “me” I made myself to be. Behind all that my mind likes to categorise and put in boxes for me to relate to, thinking it is me, behind this great illusion of needing validation apart from the true source within, behind everything lies stillness and peace. I watch from behind “myself” the chaos of my being disintegrating. And I let it break. I let it slowly die of starvation. I will not feed it fear anymore. Because I’m tired. So so tired. Watching it at the same time as “I” react in it. Witness and actor all the same… The play, the illusion, the game… The spectator… All the same… It’s all Her. Eternity making shapes… What more is there really than to just let it be? Let it be, and let it go. Whatever is, is. I trust I’ll have the courage and enough discernment to stay aware… To remember. To be.
Journey To The Self 