I was trying to remember where I was for the past years in these end of year dates, and I realised how my memory is going back to it’s original state of non-linear recognition of time frames.
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What stays with us is the lesson learned, the experience lived, the actual essence and wisdom of whatever “seems” to happen and how we “interpret” it.
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It is very interesting to grow older… So many things can only make sense in time. As most of you know by now as I repeat it often, since I am small I have this longing to be old.
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I am grateful. Truly grateful to be able to have these thoughts. To be able to have enough love, food, money, comfort, so that my main focus is not survival, but learning, remembering and serving.
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I think of this often. Along with death, maybe it’s what I most think about. To be able to feel, express, analise, observe, experiment, search for the way out of suffering, live in these ways, can only be truly fulfilled with constant atention and practice. And to do this, one cannot be hungry, or in danger… Or at least one’s priorities will surely be different in each situation.
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To be, a student of one’s own life and existence. For me, that is the greatest gift of my present life. Thank you.
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I don’t know why I feel this is a seed. Something growing in me. A change of direction maybe in the way I serve and offer myself. I just know what makes my heart sing, and for a long time now, I feel I need to get closer to being a bridge somehow, with learning how to die, so we can learn how to live. Living and dying in community. With learning how to see situations from very large perspectives. Who knows, not me, but I am happy to continue flowing with my intuition as my guide.
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Journey To The Self 