The Renowned Orders of the Night by Anselm Kiefer.
“The underworld has gone into the unconscious: even become the unconscious. Depth psychology is where today we find the initiatory mysteries, the long journey of psychic learning, ancestor worship, the encounters with demons and shadows, and the sufferings of hell.” James Hillman.
Darkness. I have fallen into a well of darkness. Dense. Obscure. Black.
I can’t see anything, but there is a constant pounding, a constant drum-like force resounding in the atmosphere.
It is the sound of my blood rushing from my heart through my arteries and veins. Haven’t heard it so clearly before. Never listened to it in complete awareness. Now it’s such a deafening noise I can’t understand how I’ve ignored it my whole life.
I take a few deep breaths and I realize that the darkness is inside myself, and so is the light.
This awareness lights up the darkness around me, letting a little flame do its magic.
I can see clearly what the darkness is all about; and how necessary it has always been. Only in that moment of nothingness can all be possible.
Darkness is just the other side of the coin of existence, the unrevealed mystery and secret of light. It needs to spread its wings and cover the winding paths of our mortal half, so that the divine may arise and be reborn.
It will shed the layers of the past, it will destroy the sound of ego, and it will pierce us deep in our souls only to show us how bright and luminous we truly are.
Darkness, how much I’ve always feared your power! And now, you are my saviour.
I have been working and living on an island in the middle of nowhere for the past seven months. As the space to reach out is limited, the only place to really go to is within. I think that’s why I love islands, they make you learn and grow at a very fast rate. Each island is different, and each circumstance is different. But what is undeniable is the power of your own mind and will to overcome all situations.
Here are some of the lessons that I’ve learnt this time, on this island, in this circumstance.
1. Love
I was very lucky to be able to share this experience with my soulmate, the love of my life, my eternal partner in adventure. Having someone by your side that supports and uplifts you is a gift. It can also be seen sometimes as an escape from your own frustrations. And that is a dangerous line to cross. I have to admit I wasn’t the best at overcoming my own emotions on my own, and many days I paid off my negativity with the person who less deserved it. The key is to be aware of these weak moments and apologise, and learn from them. I want to tell him how sorry I am for sometimes letting him swim without a life jacket or boat in the chaos of my moods. The meditative state of mind isn’t easy to achieve, and we all have moments of joy, and moments of anger, fear and frustration. I’ve learnt, or tried to learn, how to leave perceptions of reality alone, and not take them too seriously. But sometimes I failed and I only caused suffering to the person I loved the most. We can let these moments bury us underneath layers of shame and regret, or we can let them teach us a life lesson; and that is my choice. I love you, and I will be eternally grateful for your presence in my life.
2. Family
Being far away from your loved ones teaches you to appreciate them even more. From a distance it is possible to see a bigger picture of what is really important. My family, my friends, have been with me in my heart and soul for all these months, but I have learnt that the time we spend with the people we love is a present, and as such we should always be thankful for them. Connecting often, and letting them know how much you care, comes naturally, because in the distance, and sometimes in your own loneliness, you will find that some relationships are eternal. Love is always present.
3. Time
Time isn’t real; it is just our perception of how change is impermanence; the passing of moments for eternity. Time can slow down, even stop, on an island. It can also be hectic at times when work overloads you. The secret is to steady the breath, and with it, steady the mind. I’ve learnt to appreciate the little moments I had to just sit down and be; to do Yoga and reunite my body, mind and spirit to the source of everything that is; to play my ukulele, to draw or write and read; to do what I love (apart from diving!). It is so important to keep time aside for yourself, to connect to yourself. That’s the secret of knowing that everything and everyone is in constant union; and that union starts with yourself.
4. Stages of Grief
The stages of grief are real, and we all go through them at some point in our lives. It starts off with Denial; denying the situation or circumstance you perceive yourself to be in. Then, Anger hits you, and it’s like a chaotic hurricane of frustration, fear, and negativity, that makes you lose sight of the greater picture. After that stage comes Bargain; you try to talk yourself into some kind of change that you think will make you happier; but real happiness can only come from within. Nothing exterior, will ever give you eternal joy. Depression might strike you in the beginning when you realise this. Nothing that you are doing, or trying to change externally is helping you feel better, or happier. At the end of it there is only one last thing to do, Accept. With acceptance comes surrender to what is, and with acceptance of what is, which is always perfect no matter what you think at that moment, comes true Freedom. And with it comes eternal joy, knowing that everything happens in the correct time and space, everything happens for a reason, you start to believe again in the greater picture.
5. Nature
An island is a perfect place to be in contact with nature, what else can there be! Green, and blue surround you. Mother Gaia in all her splendour. The Sun, trees, fruits, flowers, birds…. And the majestic Ocean that opens up to you and shows you its hidden treasures and eternal secrets (to me a lot, being a diver!). The stars and the Moon at night, showing us how life moves in constant cycles. Birth, Life, Death and Rebirth. Sunrises and Sunsets. We are part of Nature, our job is to protect her and be thankful for all that she gives us, day after day, without asking anything in exchange. Being underwater, being able to swim in the sacred waters of this world is a gift, and I am eternally thankful to be able to do it all around this beautiful Earth.
6. People
People will never stop surprising me. It is incredible to be able to connect with someone in such deep levels, and not do it with others. Our energy can’t be fooled. If you are truly attuned to your intuition, she will always guide you to find the connections that are really necessary for you to grow and learn. People we meet, we meet for a reason. They are mirrors that reflect back at us parts of ourselves that we love, or parts of ourselves that we detest. Everyone we encounter is an opportunity for our own growth and maturity; emotionally, psychologically and spiritually. Never ignore these signs, they are a powerful portal to knowing your own true self.
7. Balance
Achieving balance in life is an art, and it takes practice and hard work. Balancing our emotions, and trying to keep under control our past conditioning takes time. I have learnt that whenever the focus would shift from eternal to materialistic forms of looking at life, I would lose balance. The key was to concentrate on my own breath; inhaling and exhaling. Giving and letting go. Life will always be full of ups and downs, good and bad, right and wrong…. But in reality that is only a perception, it isn’t real. The only thing that is real is equilibrium, and the only thing we will ever be able to control is our own perceptions of external circumstances. Learning how to do this is a lifelong path, one that I chose to follow every day.
8. Dreams
Probably the most important lesson for me. Since I was a small girl I have always followed my mother’s wise advice: “always follow your heart, no matter what”. When you follow your true passion, all the doors of the Universe will open for you. But, as I have lived many times, if you sacrifice your values and dreams, doors will start to close, and depression, grief, sadness will slowly settle in your soul. Only by knowing how to read the signs and following your own intuition and heart, you can find your life purpose. You are here for a reason, and deep inside, you know it. Unlock the mysteries of your own heart, and go for it!!!
“Nachiketas asked: ‘What lies beyond right and wrong, beyond cause and effect, beyond past and future?’Death said: ‘Theword the Vedas extol, austerities proclaim, sanctities approach – that word is Om. That word is eternal Spirit, eternal distance; who knows it attains to his desire. That word is the ultimate foundation. Who finds it is adored among the saints. The Self knows all, is not born, does not die, is not the effect of any cause; is eternal, self-existent, imperishable, ancient. How can the killing of the body kill him?’”
Katha-Upanishad
Om is the supreme mantra (mystical sound) of Hindu origin, but sacred and important to various religions of Dharmic origin (Hinduism, Buddhism, Jainism…). It is the sound vibration of the Absolute, which lies beneath everything manifested (physical plane, causal plane, subtle plane). It is the sound of silence, the sound of the Self, the sound of Being. The sound “A” represents Creation, like Brahma. The sound “U” represents Conservation, like Vishnu. The sound “M” represents Dissolution, like Shiva. Om is the all encompassing vibration of the Universe.
Artist Unknown
“The word Om is the Imperishable; all this its manifestation. Past, present, future – everything is Om. Whatever trascends the three divisions of time, that too is Om.There is nothing that is not Spirit. The personal self is the impersonal Spirit. It has four conditions. This Self, though beyond words, is that supreme word Om; though indivisible, it can be divided in three letters corresponding to the three conditions of the Self, the letter “A”, the letter “U”, and the letter “M”. The waking condition, called the material condition, corresponds to the letter “A”, which leads the alphabet and breathes in all the other letters. He who understands,gets all he wants; becomes a leader among men.The dreaming condition, called the mental condition, corresponds to the second letter “U”. It upholds; stands between waking and sleeping. He who understands, upholds the tradition of spiritual knowledge and looks upon everything with an impartial eye. No one ignorant of Spirit is born into his family.Undreaming sleep, called the intellectual condition, corresponds to the letter “M”. It weighs and unites. He who understands, weighs the world; rejects; unites himself with the cause.The fourth condition of the Self corresponds to Om as One, indivisible Word. He is whole; beyond bargain. The world disappears in Him. He is the good; the one without asecond. Thus Om is nothing but Self. He who understands, with the help of his personal self, merges himself into the impersonal Self; He who understands.”
“Death said: ‘God made sense turn outward, man therefore looks outward, not onto himself. Now and again a daring soul, desiring immortality, has looked back and found himself. The ignorant man runs after pleasure, sinks into the entanglements of death; but the wise man, seeking the undying, does not run among things that die.’”
Katha-Upanishad
And the eternal return will be going on forever.
It’s shape is a spiral that circles in all directions.
Cause. Effect. Cause. Effect.
Birth. Life. Death. Rebirth.
Nothing is permanent except impermanence.
Truth is the eternal Law of Nature.
Whoever follows his desires in order to fulfill the void he feels inside, will forever be disappointed.
Whoever knows that desire is the cause of suffering, will be free.
Emptiness and silence are freedom, whatever fills them, only illusion.
Only when there is nothing, can everything exist.
I could go on forever with different paradoxes and contrary ideas, at least they look as such at first glance.
But that’s what life is made of.
It is made of ups and downs, happiness and sadness, birth and death, light and darkness…
He who understands the nature of all of these, knows they are not contrary, knows they are but different levels of one same thing, knows that only the permanent can give eternal joy, and the impermanent can only bring momentaneous satisfaction.
Know thyself, for only there lies the eternal soul, union with all that is, and will ever be.
Know that the acceptance of permanent impermanence will make you free.
Know that the union with your Self, will make you immortal.
Elisabeth Haich (1897-1994) was a hungarian born author and spiritual teacher. In 1941, with the help of Selvarajan Yusidan, she founded the first european Yoga school in Budapest. After World War II, they had to close it down and she fled to Switzerland where she founded another Yoga school there.
Her books are an insight to the themes of past lives and spirituality as a total, detailing events of her early life in Hungary, as well as details of past lives, including her initiation in the Pyramid by Ptahotep, in ancient Egypt.
The Truths that are found reading between lines are the eternal truths of Humanity. The Divine residing in all of us has to be awakened from the dormant state, and we must break the illusion of separateness to, once again, attain unity, or Yoga, with everything that there is, and will ever be.
Teachings of Hermes Trismegistus, ancient egyptian philosophy, mathematics, astrology, Buddhist, Tantra and Zen philosophies, as well as Judeo-Christian beliefs, are all imbeded in her texts, making it a complete compound of profound wisdom that might as well open our minds to our own truths.
Here are some quotes from her amazing book, Initiation by Elisabeth Haich. Enjoy!
“All the Sons of God have always brought and always will bring the same truth into different parts of the earth, but people will interpret it differently depending on the characteristics of their race and their degree of development. These different interpretations, as they get passed on to later generations, will give rise to different religions all springing from the same truths. One and the same Son of God will reincarnate himself at different times and in different places of the earth in order to proclaim the highest truth to humanity. And, from the same truth proclaimed by the same spirit, people in different parts of the earth will develop different religions. Because of such differences arising merely from human ignorance, people will make war upon each other, trying to send each other to hell ‘in the name of God’.”
“Because man has fallen out of his divine consciousness, he can only imagine God in accordance with his own personal power of understanding. How can he know what the real, living divinity is like in its perfection when his power of imagination only corresponds to the level he personally stands on, separated as he is from unity, and having fallen as he has from divinity? How can the finite understand the infinite, the mortal the immortal, the temporal the eternal? How can an imaginary being understand experience and become identical with the eternal, true being – God?”
“Eternity is the eternal present; infinity is the eternal future which can never be reached and never becomes present. Eternity never had a beginning and thus will never have an end. Eternity is timeless present which has no past nor future. Infinity, however, means a falling out of eternity into the future, without a present!”
“In happiness there is no time: our consciousness stands still; the concept of time disappears. Only when happiness is over do we suddenly realize that while our consciousness was hovering timelessly in the eternal present, time was rushing onward. Time begins with our fall from happiness, from paradise. But unhappiness too knows no time, for the more unhappy we feel, the slower time goes by; minutes seem hours, and in our moments of deepest despair, when sufferings and torture are unbearable, every moment becomes an infinity; time freezes! Oh, how right Satan is! The highest and the lowest are alike as two twins, just like reality and its reflection, appearance. Happiness is timeless eternity, and the opposite, unhappiness, is endless time – infinity!”
“Oh, you wonderful, wonderful sea! Beloved sea, always the same, understanding everything, experiencing everything and surviving everything! Oh, you dear friend, you who have listened so often to me tell you of my pains and joys and sorrows… listened so understandingly… and offered me the consolation of your infinity and eternity… your uplifting consolation surpasses everything human! You are here – you are here again – you are always here, unchanged, and I can look into your depths again, listen to your waves as they tell about eternity…”
